MISSION ACCEPTED
Looking back, the night of my bachelor party was rather surreal and magical. Saturday had an ominous beginning. It was a cloudy and overcast day. I was still tired as hell and a little groggy from all the drinking that we were doing the night before. The action didn’t really start until we checked into the hotel in the heart of Philadelphia at around 5:30 in the afternoon. It was there that Ko’s Wild Ride officially began. I was handed a list with 10 acts that needed to be performed by 1 AM. Some of you might be wondering what’s on this magical typed list of things to do. Well, here it is
Kiss a girl, whose name is Jenny, on the cheeks. (My fiancee's name is Jenny)
Have a girl buy you a drink
Get a girl’s underwear (bra or panties)
Have a girl do a body shot off of you (or do a body shot off a girl)
Dance by yourself on the dance floor (I am a terrible dancer; it's a scary sight. People went blind from watching me dance)
Have people you don’t know write on the back of this list why you should NOT get married.
Serenade a girl at a bar that you don’t know (much like the dancing; something that I am so horrible at that people around the bar went deaf)
Find a Bachelorette party or a party of girls and get in a picture with them
Get the phone number of any girl that’s present
Get spanked by 3 or more girls
For every item not completed, I was supposed to take a shot of Jaegermister; yes, Pup can be a cruel stuffed bear sometimes. Let me let you in on a little secret about me; I am a cheap date….a super duper cheap date. Two drinks is all that it takes for me to have a great time. Anyways, the gang (Pup, Spammy, Multi-cultural Boy, The Cuz, and The Canadian) then all proceeded to take bets on how many of these items I would actually complete. Losers would pay for and take as many shots as needed with me.
Spammy – 5
Pup – 6
The Canadian – 7
The Cuz – 8
MCB – 9
After carefully reviewing the list, I thought to myself. Nine out of ten things on this list are really not that hard to do. I can get this shit done in 2 or 3 hours in the right setting; the tricky one will probably be the one involving undergarments…
To be continued…
Showing posts with label KO. Show all posts
Showing posts with label KO. Show all posts
Monday, November 22, 2004
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
IT'S NOT PHILOSOPHY
Personally, I think the terrorist problem is something that can be traced to economics and education level rather than differences in philosophy or religion. Saying that it is a philosophical or religious issue is a gross simplification of the overall problem. It’s an issue of Haves versus Have-Nots.
Part of the problem with a lot of countries where terrorists are recruited from, is that they have a lot of young people but not enough jobs. For instance, Saudi Arabia pretty much only has the oil industry; it has made the royal family very wealthy, but unemployment rate is 25% in 2003. That’s a pretty bleak looking future when even McDonald’s might not have a job for you. It’s a bad combination of a bunch of desperate people with nothing to lose and people of influence/authority pointing out a scapegoat to these people that we get to the situation where we are at today.
To solve this problem, we gotta have a second coming of the Marshall Plan. If we accelerate the economic growth of these developing and underdeveloped nations, we would cut the number of new recruits willing to die for an extremist ideology by a million. It's all about getting people to move up & fulfill more of their personal needs on Maslow's Hierarchy Of Needs. To me, it’s not a Muslim versus Christian or East versus West issue. Generally, people are not going to commit themselves to a cause that requires sacrificing their lives if they have hope and a better prospect for the future.
Whoo! I just used a pop psych reference. How do you like them apples, Dr. Pup?
Personally, I think the terrorist problem is something that can be traced to economics and education level rather than differences in philosophy or religion. Saying that it is a philosophical or religious issue is a gross simplification of the overall problem. It’s an issue of Haves versus Have-Nots.
Part of the problem with a lot of countries where terrorists are recruited from, is that they have a lot of young people but not enough jobs. For instance, Saudi Arabia pretty much only has the oil industry; it has made the royal family very wealthy, but unemployment rate is 25% in 2003. That’s a pretty bleak looking future when even McDonald’s might not have a job for you. It’s a bad combination of a bunch of desperate people with nothing to lose and people of influence/authority pointing out a scapegoat to these people that we get to the situation where we are at today.
To solve this problem, we gotta have a second coming of the Marshall Plan. If we accelerate the economic growth of these developing and underdeveloped nations, we would cut the number of new recruits willing to die for an extremist ideology by a million. It's all about getting people to move up & fulfill more of their personal needs on Maslow's Hierarchy Of Needs. To me, it’s not a Muslim versus Christian or East versus West issue. Generally, people are not going to commit themselves to a cause that requires sacrificing their lives if they have hope and a better prospect for the future.
Whoo! I just used a pop psych reference. How do you like them apples, Dr. Pup?
Saturday, August 21, 2004
Holy Matrimony!
When I saw this Askmen.com article, I knew I had to post it for my fellow Blog contributors. I thought it was somewhat amusing and appropriate for T and Pup since it's one of those 10 things to do to pick up chicks at a wedding. Well, maybe the article is more for Pup than for T since he has more upcoming weddings to go.
Reading this article, however, reminded me a lot of reading these cookie-cutter management/self-improvement books since they all seem to provide a "method" for people to become more successful/happier. Personally, I always believed that these cookie-cutter methods on how to improve your life or situation is a crock of bullshit. I believe that when you are looking to improve your whatever; you have to take into account your own strengths and weaknesses.
Personal Example
I have always been terrible at picking up strangers. Seriously, it's just not my forte. I am talking about moments of really awkward silences after I TRY to use pick-up lines. Bottomline is that I didn't feel comfortable approaching and chatting it up with women who I didn't know. That's why I didn't meet the future Mrs. in a bar/club or at a wedding. I met her, because we were both trying to start the same club while we were in business school. We started hanging out after classes with other friends, and the rest is history....well things didn't actually go smoothly at least after I took a few more rejections by the fiancee.
So maybe, it's a good idea for T to join a book club at the Barnes & Noble. No, DO NOT join the Sci-fi or Fantasy book club. Okay you can join one, but you have to join another book club that has more women. Try the mystery or general fiction book club. You gotta try and do something. Don't be hurt and give up after the first rejection. Learn from my example. If you truly believe someone is worth going after, you can't give up so easily. You gotta have some conviction!
So how's the best man's toast going, Pup? Have you been practicing your Thai? If you read the article, nothing screams husband material or enhances your scoring opportunity like a great toast/speech. Better start practicing in front of the bathroom mirror!
When I saw this Askmen.com article, I knew I had to post it for my fellow Blog contributors. I thought it was somewhat amusing and appropriate for T and Pup since it's one of those 10 things to do to pick up chicks at a wedding. Well, maybe the article is more for Pup than for T since he has more upcoming weddings to go.
Reading this article, however, reminded me a lot of reading these cookie-cutter management/self-improvement books since they all seem to provide a "method" for people to become more successful/happier. Personally, I always believed that these cookie-cutter methods on how to improve your life or situation is a crock of bullshit. I believe that when you are looking to improve your whatever; you have to take into account your own strengths and weaknesses.
Personal Example
I have always been terrible at picking up strangers. Seriously, it's just not my forte. I am talking about moments of really awkward silences after I TRY to use pick-up lines. Bottomline is that I didn't feel comfortable approaching and chatting it up with women who I didn't know. That's why I didn't meet the future Mrs. in a bar/club or at a wedding. I met her, because we were both trying to start the same club while we were in business school. We started hanging out after classes with other friends, and the rest is history....well things didn't actually go smoothly at least after I took a few more rejections by the fiancee.
So maybe, it's a good idea for T to join a book club at the Barnes & Noble. No, DO NOT join the Sci-fi or Fantasy book club. Okay you can join one, but you have to join another book club that has more women. Try the mystery or general fiction book club. You gotta try and do something. Don't be hurt and give up after the first rejection. Learn from my example. If you truly believe someone is worth going after, you can't give up so easily. You gotta have some conviction!
So how's the best man's toast going, Pup? Have you been practicing your Thai? If you read the article, nothing screams husband material or enhances your scoring opportunity like a great toast/speech. Better start practicing in front of the bathroom mirror!
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
Just What The Doctor Ordered
This is just what we need medication to turn us from procrastinators into workaholics. I love the miracle that is modern science.
This is just what we need medication to turn us from procrastinators into workaholics. I love the miracle that is modern science.
Friday, August 06, 2004
New Dutch Law
Ladies,
You and your toes can now safely travel about Holland without fear of molestation thanks to a new Dutch law protecting your toes from unsolicited licking.
Ladies,
You and your toes can now safely travel about Holland without fear of molestation thanks to a new Dutch law protecting your toes from unsolicited licking.
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Maggots!
Not sure how I feel about maggots being classified and used as a medical device. Strangely disturbing, but I guess it beats amputation...
Not sure how I feel about maggots being classified and used as a medical device. Strangely disturbing, but I guess it beats amputation...
Sunday, August 01, 2004
I'm back...
and I am engaged. According to Pup, I finally tricked some unwitting soul into marrying me...LOL. Sorry Pup and T, I didn't bring you back any pr0n from Thailand. Use the Internet; that's why it was invented for.
It's been a while, but it's time to make fun of T. On 2 separate occasions, I have tried to set T up. Upon one meeting or date, my female friends have questioned my sanity in setting them up with T. Twice, I have been forced to defend my judgment by saying "At least, T ain't a serial killer!"
It seems to me that T is like the struggling US retailer, Kmart. That's right, you are Kmart! No matter how many customer you get to shop there for the first time. People just don't want to go back. So I think T needs to find a way to boost "customer satisfaction". So please help T by giving him some tips on improving "customer satisfaction".
and I am engaged. According to Pup, I finally tricked some unwitting soul into marrying me...LOL. Sorry Pup and T, I didn't bring you back any pr0n from Thailand. Use the Internet; that's why it was invented for.
It's been a while, but it's time to make fun of T. On 2 separate occasions, I have tried to set T up. Upon one meeting or date, my female friends have questioned my sanity in setting them up with T. Twice, I have been forced to defend my judgment by saying "At least, T ain't a serial killer!"
It seems to me that T is like the struggling US retailer, Kmart. That's right, you are Kmart! No matter how many customer you get to shop there for the first time. People just don't want to go back. So I think T needs to find a way to boost "customer satisfaction". So please help T by giving him some tips on improving "customer satisfaction".
Friday, July 16, 2004
Greetings From Asia
Just wanted to give my peeps in the 404 a quick shoutout. It's been over 19 years since I have been back to Taiwan. It's insane the number of people driving SUVs on this little island. It doesn't help that SUVs share the roads here with pedestrians, bicyclers, people on motor scooters, and motorcyclists. Plus, Taiwanese SUV drivers seem to share the same disregard and disdain for others as the ones in the US.
I honestly do not recognize the skyline of the city that I grew up in. It's amazing to see that the 6-story apartment building that you used to live in has been now replaced by a 20-story office building filled with crazy billboards and neon signs.
Can I tell everyone how great the food is? I have been eating non-stop since I have landed. It's nice how fresh and cheap the fruit and vegetables are here.
I also spent some time with my terminally ill grandfather in a hospital emergency room. It is really sad to see him in so much pain from the radiation therapy. We are goinig back to see him again this morning.
It's good to be back.
Just wanted to give my peeps in the 404 a quick shoutout. It's been over 19 years since I have been back to Taiwan. It's insane the number of people driving SUVs on this little island. It doesn't help that SUVs share the roads here with pedestrians, bicyclers, people on motor scooters, and motorcyclists. Plus, Taiwanese SUV drivers seem to share the same disregard and disdain for others as the ones in the US.
I honestly do not recognize the skyline of the city that I grew up in. It's amazing to see that the 6-story apartment building that you used to live in has been now replaced by a 20-story office building filled with crazy billboards and neon signs.
Can I tell everyone how great the food is? I have been eating non-stop since I have landed. It's nice how fresh and cheap the fruit and vegetables are here.
I also spent some time with my terminally ill grandfather in a hospital emergency room. It is really sad to see him in so much pain from the radiation therapy. We are goinig back to see him again this morning.
It's good to be back.
Friday, July 02, 2004
It seems that some really "creative" women are trying out the tried and true formula of shooting Crazy Boys Partying In PCB (Let me give a shoutout to all my peeps from PCB}. This brillantly artistic video will be imaginatively titled Boys Gone Wild....
I guess there's still some women in this world who haven't figured out it's not that hard to get boys to act all wild and crazy; all it takes is a hot female asking(a woman doesn't even have to be hot to get any results, depending on how inebriated an individual is). So the question is...if this woman talked T into dropping trou, can T count this as talking to 3 women?
I am just trying to help a brotha meet his quotas.
I guess there's still some women in this world who haven't figured out it's not that hard to get boys to act all wild and crazy; all it takes is a hot female asking(a woman doesn't even have to be hot to get any results, depending on how inebriated an individual is). So the question is...if this woman talked T into dropping trou, can T count this as talking to 3 women?
I am just trying to help a brotha meet his quotas.
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
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