Friday, March 31, 2006

Time to Change... Something... Anything

Somthing needs to change. I'm not sure what, but something gotta change. I'm seeing a pattern lately that's been more apparent recently.

In all aspects of my life lately, I've come close to getting what I want, but there would always be a major flaw. I'm not blind enough to always blame the flaw on others when it doesn't work out, because I know some of this is me, but damn. What the hell? Seems like there's something or someone just fucking with me.

My life like a strip club. Always a tease. Well, that's all the similarities really cause there's no hot or skanky chicks around here and I don't enjoy drunk dudes hanging around my couch.

For example, I'm house hunting. There are so many homes I've seen as good, not perfect, but good enough that I can do with. Then a big thing would happen like bad school systems (resell reasons), in airport flight path (noisy), giant radio tower in backyard, or someone buying it before me. Those are total deal breakers.

It's hard enough to find a house I like cause what I'm a bit specific in what I like, and it's hard to find in the area of town I want to live. When I do find one, crap happens.

Strangely, same thing with the ladies. Some seems so perfect on paper or when people talk about them, and are in person too, but then for whatever reason, no sparks between us (maybe it's that whole dating yourself thing. Why bother huh?). Then there are those that I'd have lots of sparks with, but sadly are seriously unstable and undatable. Of course there's always that one from the past that I still wish things were differnt with. I know it's me in a lot of these cases, but damn. Can't a good one just come along... without the major problem this time?

With the spring coming, something needs to change. I don't know what or how, but something's gonna be different.

Personally, I blame it on Jesus. I just found out I'm the spotlight employee of the month for April. Jesus doesn't like competition with the whole I rose from the dead to be our all might lord and savior, April's my month bitches, blah blah blah.

I'm on to you JC. Share the spotlight. Stop fucking with me and help a brotha out.


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