Monday, February 28, 2005

Air Blogger

Generally, during my weekend travels that requires me to be stuck in a giant tin can with people that I wonder how I would interact act with if we were to crash on some deserted island with no hopes of being rescued, I would entertain myself with a book, my trusty gameboy, my MP3 player, or good ol’ sleep.

Oh yea, the deserted island scenario is a staple every time I fly. Sadly, the chances of crashing in a remote tropical island on the flight from Philly to Kansas City are quite slim. Oh well, that’s what imagination is for…

Immmmaaaaginaaaation.... Immmmmmaaaginaaaation....

Well, I forgot to bring a book. My gameboy’s battery is dead. I forgot my MP3 player. I have a throbbing headache that won’t allow me to sleep. Good thing I brought my laptop this trip. So I guess I’ll just type away here on my computer.

I’ll warn you now, if you continue to read, this is time that you’ll never get back and there’s no refund or exchanges.

I usually catch a late flight home on Sunday nights so I can maximize my weekends elsewhere, this time is no different. Flying at night is very introspective. Unless you dose off. Then you’re just asleep and not so much introspective. Well, maybe you still are if you’re dreaming… Hmmm.. anyway.

I always get a window seat so I can look out the window. I like the lights that illuminate small towns and cities as we fly by. I wonder what they’re doing down there. Who those people are and what stories do they have? Does someone down there think The Killer’s rock as much as I do?

Tonight, we’re flying through cloudy skies so it’s pitch black outside except for the blinking lights on the wings. I sit and stare at the wing waiting...

I heard once that during cloudy dark flights like this one, gremlins sometime comes out to play. No one knows where they come from, no one knows why. They play on the wings of unsuspecting planes. Ripping out metal sheets one by one and slowly tearing the wings apart.

Now all seems lost if a gremlin shows up on your plane since you can’t exactly go outside to stop them. Luckily for us though, these gremlins have a big weakness. That weakness is being unable to play and do their damage if someone is looking at them.

It’s that simple. They will only do damage if no one pays attention.

So I sit here in my seat by the window staring. Staring at our right wing during this whole flight. Keeping the gremlins away. Keeping people safe.

This is what happens when I don’t have my toys on the airplane.

I’m going to go to the bathroom to figure out if it’s actually feasible to have sex in there. That thing is SO tiny. I don’t think so, but I’ll go double check and work out some possible positions.

This is all making SO little sense. Even for me. Argh.. I wish my headache would stop... Stupid flu.

Oh.. landing time. Yay.. almost home.

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