Geek Alert! 

I just found this out and thought you may find it interesting.  During the Comic Con this weekend in San Diego, the full name of the last Star wars movie was revealed. 

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

It's a nice homage to the original title of the last Star Wars trilology, Revenge of the Jedi. 

Please Mr. Lucas, don't screw this up.  You can redeme the first two by making this Macktastical.  I'm free for consultation anytime.  Have your people call mine. 

Happy Friday!

Macktastic

Inspired by LiAps’ post on making/coining new phrases, I’d like to propose the following new adjective.  “Macktastic”!  Say it with me…  “Damn that’s super fly, that’s just Macccktaaaastic!” 

Too long have we been under the monopoly of “Fantastic” and its variations such as Fan-freaken-tastic.  Now, from the streets, from the people, comes Macktastic!

Macktastic is used to describe anything that’s not only good, but also has flava.  It’s not good enough to be good, cause that’ll get you a Fantastic.  To be Macktastic, it’s gotta be street.  Pimp it up for me there..  Mackkkkktastic!  (move your head from left to right a bit when you say it). 

Some examples that comes to mind:
Al Sharpton’s speech was Macktastic!  Not only was it a good speech, but it gets street cred. with the homeys. He could’ve said the speech with a feathered hat and a cane.  Still macking..

Red and Sloth?  Macktastical…like magical creatures, but with that “in the hood” flava!

Furdells, LiAps, Pinzs?  Mackady Mack Mack… Mackaroos..

T & Ko?  Mack-a-roni… have yourself a bowl..

All you others I can’t remember right now?  You’re pretty enough, you’re smart enough, and by golly, you’re Macktastic and people like you!!    

Straight Up Street Yo.  You know where it’s at.        

Bishop Don Pup Shizzle

The Pumpkin Incident at College St. and University Dr.


4:44am. The music of Bach plays softly in the background. The night is humid. The sky is overcast; the moon peaks through the thick clouds from time to time.... Waiting for the light to break free is something to do. The feeling is calm yet eerie. Funny how an LCD display of four looks like a two pronged pitchfork.... My thoughts wonder fluidly. I must fall asleep soon else tomorrow will be miserable....

My eyes are alert but there is no threat, except the darkness. The shadows take form around me and I lie still. I'm relaxed; somber. Then the quiet darkness begins to consume me. I'm frightened, just a little. I'll sleep once it takes over me. I wait.

These incidents take place 4 weeks ago. I try to forget the occurrence of Love. Here's how it happened. 2pm. Thursday. The phone rings. "Mr. T, may I ask a favor of you? I need a ride home after work." She gives me directions to her job and I arrive there around 5pm. "Its good to see you," she says. "I can't go home yet; I don't have a key to the apartment. Let's hang out at your office. My roommate will get me from there." It seems innocent enough; I don't mind catching up with a friend. Two hours later her roommate shows up. "Oh, by the way, I'll need you to get me again tomorrow, if you don't mind." I don't mind.

Her car is broken. Likely story. But I've been there many times myself. "What are you doing about the car?" I learn that the transmission is shot to hell. "I'm saving up. My parents will help, but I don't want to exploit them." Yeah, that's why I'm here.

The weekend comes and goes. Eventless? Well Airek was there. I think that was the wicked Jaeger weekend..... Anyway, Monday comes and I'm looking forward to seeing my love again. I arrive to pick her up. "Its a Taco Bell day," I proclaim. "Let's grab a few soft tacos on the way back to the office." "Um, okay. But after tacos let's go to Target." Taco Bell is on the way back to the office; Target is two miles out of the way. I give in to her, ummmmm....demand?

For the next few weeks I make several trips around town for her; fast food joints for soda and fries, Target again, Walmart (for me), the drug store for juice, the convenience store for crackers, church for bible study and/or choir practice, Target again.... "I've got to get gas!" Silence. I pump the gas. I pay. We always end up at my office waiting for her roommate to come around. She's always on the phone and my PC while we wait. "You can talk to me. I love to hear sounds of life around me," she says. "But you're not being attentive. I may as well be inanimate. I'm not thrilled by listening to my own voice. If I talk, at least look in my direction." "Say that again...."

The next Friday comes around. "My job assignment ends next week. I can either go back home and live with my parents until the fall semester starts, or you can help me find a job." I, being of a working class family, become excited of her ambition to go job hunting. "Great! I'll make it my mission to help you get a job. Monday we'll go around town and get you some applications!" Monday comes and I drive her to several strip malls. "You'll have to get the forms for me. I don't have the courage to do so myself." But I don't need the job. I'm not doing this for my health, you know. "Sure. But you'll have to learn to do this. Watch what I do." I score her seven application forms; she gets one on her own.

Back at my office: "What is the one thing that annoys you most about me?" The way you ignore me. "You always seem to strike up a conversation with the telephone while I'm right here." The way you treat me as your favorite lap dog. "Honestly, I know there are other people in your life, but I'm right here--right now. I like to believe I can provide good company." A small giggle. She has exposed me and I let her do it. She knows now that this, of her many devices, hurts me the most, yet she makes no effort to ease the pain. I feel ashamed for admitting this to her. I begin to take back what I said, by rationalizing her actions. "You work all day. You're away from your friends. Of course you want to catch up. I shouldn't let it bother me." I plead for mercy. But its too late.

"I've decided I won't get a job in town after all. I have to go up north to help my brother with his family. Of course you'll get me from work until the assignment ends.... Thanks for your help, pumpkin. You mean so much to me."

And so a few days later, it ends. "Why do we do it, Airek? Why do we do everything and anything for them?" "We do it because they control us." I do it because I'm weak. "They have mysterious powers over us." I'm a fucking weakling. "We are defenseless...." A fucking coward, I am.

I did learn a lesson. I had a love for a brief moment. Though we were never physical the love was there. I demonized her here, but actually we did bond well together. There were moments where we shared confessions as we sat out on the grass in the evening haze. We talked of our futures and dreams and desires. Those moments were few and far between, but the entire affair was just as temporal. A boyish fantasy of flying to the moon--my wish to be in love, "ten years from now...."

It seems the only thing I lost is 250 miles on my car, 75 of those miles are mine. So what did I learn? You have to take care of the things you love. True friendship is a rare commodity; longevity of any relationship requires care and love. I committed my will to her needs. She waited on me as a infant waits on her father. I cared for her, though not passionately, rather paternally(?). I'm still confused. Think I'll get a plant.

DNC observations

I watched DNC and Teresa's speech last night.  I don’t have cable (cause I’m a cheap bastard), so I can’t get the full coverage of the DNC.  Thank goodness for PBS for showing the convention (and showing DCI during Thanksgiving and Christmas.  You Rock PBS!).  Yes, it’s sad when a rerun of law and order (it’s on about 12 times a day on 8 different channel at least) is more important than to show information that may help people better elect a president.  I hope they put reruns of Fear factor during the RNC.  Greedy money bastards.  Anywhoo…  

For those of you who have no idea we're having an election (you know who you are), Teresa is Kerry's (running for president against Bush) wife. 

Although not as charismatic or fired up as Barack Obama who spoke before her, Teresa spoke her mind and conveyed a strong and confident tone in her voice.   She was poised and relayed topics that have been long forgotten in the present administration.  Besides all the great messages she spoke of during her speech (won't go in detail here, read link for transcript), one thing really stood out to me about Teresa that is rarely seen in other first ladies. 

For so long, we have seen many wives of public figures in the backdrop, especially in the case of the first ladies.  Used as ornaments or in a supporting role standing behind their husbands.  In the last four years, this was the role, as many before her, of the current first lady.   

During her speech, Teresa spoke of family, her late husband, and of John Kerry.   
It was all nice, but what was clear during Teresa’s speech was that she had opinions, not just those of John, but her own that she was concerned with.  She made it clear last night that she was not going to be one that would only stand behind her husband and support him, but that she would stand beside him, not as supporter, or merely a backer, but as an equal.    

I really admire that.  I know what some of you are thinking, we're not voting for the first ladies.  The thing is.  You are.  No matter what, they're there, along with the president.  It's a combo pack.  The reason the first ladies haven't had more influence and have done more is because that's the way things have always been.  The ways things have always been isn't always right.  

How any women out there could not vote for a strong opinionated woman who wants to protect and support your rights, there’s something wrong with you. 

As Quoted from last night’s speech “And my only hope is that one day soon, My only hope is that, one day soon, women, who have all earned their right to their opinions...  instead of being labeled opinionated will be called smart and well-informed, just like men. “

I would LOVE to see a Teresa vs. Laura debate.  I’d pay to see that. Even being the cheap bastard that I am.    

What happened to crayon?
I guess there's always the archives....

Lunch anyone?

Is it bad to go over to the neighboring department's vending machine for prime-o munchies? Is that trespassing? So I head over to ENV dept. to find only one soul in the building working too damn hard for a college professor at a college that receives like zero federal funding for research. And I interrupt his quiet meditations by digging in my pockets for seventy cents so I can get my big grab doritos on! I bet he's about to snap. Dude, I'm sorry. Its not like I go over there everyday. Just when I'm mad hungry. Anyway, he surprised me! What the hell are you doing here, Dr. So-and-so? Go home! (Hey that sounds like a good idea! See yall later! aww...wait, the boss just got back from lunch. Damn!) School starts back in three weeks. I'm not ready. Most of our faculty in physics is AWOL. This mainly because our department/building has been under construction. Asbestos abatement, new floor tiles, re-wiring of the network, new electrical power conduit.... Somehow I always find a way to stay afloat. But right now I think Dr. ENV over there is the only one on campus preparing for the fall semester. Fucker. I'm going back over there after I publish this post for gram crackers!!! That'll show him!

I know I should be working...  But...

After reading this Very funny commentary from Andrew, I just had to write my own about this article that was not published by USA Today.   

Please read this article by Ann Coulter before continuing and have a good laugh.  

A few lines I would love to point out:

"conservatives are deploying a series of covert signals to identify one another, much like gay men do." - Ha, I think the last thing conservatives would want to have in common with are gay men... or do they?  Instead of the gay-dar, do conservatives have the con-dar, or re-dar?

"As for the pretty girls, I can only guess that it's because liberal boys never try to make a move on you without the UN Security Council's approval." - First of all, all pretty girls are republican?  Oh that's a good journalist statement.  Right on Ann.  Great insight.  Also, even if it is true that liberal boys ask for consent before making a move on a women, that's bad?  When did being respectable toward the other gender become bad.  I'm assuming what you're saying from this statement is that republican guys are all jackasses that treat their women like property or some kind of trophy or piece of homemaking, reproductive meat.  In turn, all the pretty republican girls come running to the nicer liberal boys.  I have no idea who's side you are arguing for here.  

"They're calling this the "protestor's area," although I suppose a better name would be the "truth-free zone"." - This one's my favorite.  So she's calling the protestors' area, which by logic would be populated by the conservatives and republicans the "truth-free zone".  Right on Ann.  Once again, who's side are you on?  Way to attack your own beliefs.  Good going.  Thumbs up.

"Walking back from the convention site I chatted with a normal Bostonian for several blocks -- who must have identified me through our covert system of signals." - Ann, I hate to tell you this, but I'm pretty sure he's just trying to get in your pants.  Get a clue.    

Ok, must now really get back to work..

Choices

No photoshop I swear.  This was just being at the right place at the right time. 
I took this picture a few months ago in Charleston while waiting for seats at a restaurant.  It was a typical beautiful sunset, then out of nowhere, the darkness spread.  The light had no where to run.  Minutes later, the sky was darken and light was no more. 

Saw a good movie tonight.  By good, I mean Pup good, which I have found out over the years has no relationship what so ever to what the rest of the world thinks (yes, I still think "You got served" is a quality film).  

The movie was about life and all the what ifs we experience everyday..  what if you could go back and correct things that you thought went wrong in your life?  What if you could go back and change things that you've done.  What if you knew something that happened to someone else, that if you could've only warned them, things would've turned out different.

Would you do it?  Would what you altered been the right thing?  What else would have changed when the reality that you've known was altered?   

I'd like to think I wouldn't change anything I've ever done.  That I stand behind everything that I've done, or did not do.  But then, I'd be a liar. 

I look at the picture above and I envy those who think in black and white, right and wrong, good and evil.  It must be so simple for them.  Everything so clear.  Just like the picture, one path is clear, one is dark. 

I don't know much, being a teddy bear sitting on bed most days, but I do know one thing.  The truth is, nothing is that simple.  Everything we do affects so many other things that we don't know.  Some will bound to be good, some is bound to cause harm one way or another.         

Live your life.  Try to do what you think is right.  Don't be hatin' on other people and the things they do.  If there is one thing that we do have, is an ability to make choices.  Choices, that is to what it means to live.  Our own choices to cherish or regret.  That's what makes us who we are.  Take that away, and you'll create machines, who's only choice was the one that it was programmed.   

So unless you can see the whole picture, and I mean the whole picture.  Don't judge, cause you don't know.  You really don't.

Don't know where that came from.  Just the Pup effect I guess.   

Remember this…
Here’s mine!!!

Directions:
1. Copy this whole list into your journal.
2. Bold the things that are true.

01.I am perfectly content to sit by myself for hours listening to the same songs over and over again.02. I'm a loud person.
03. I would love to do country line dancing.
04. I don't really care about...anything.
05. I can completely lose myself in a song.06. Driving aimlessly while blasting music is therapeutic.07. I love fall.
08. I hate turtleneck sweaters.
09. My friends mean the world to me.
10. I also hate when people TypE LyKe D1s.
11. I only get 3-4 hours of sleep a night sometimes.
12. I believe that even if they work, long distance relationships still suck.
13. Computers suck <-- but i need them
14. I don't like people15. I like shopping for shoes.
16. I don't like studying.
17. After high school I'm going to Law school.
18. Sometimes I feel like passing out in the middle of the floor for no reason.
19. I want to go to Europe.
20. I have a lot to learn.
21. I'm vegetarian.
22. I sometimes like to watch the rain and think.
23. I like pop music.
24. Johnny Depp is beautiful.
25. Groups of the same kind of people make me sick.
26. I can type rather fast.27. I wish I could sleep better.
28. I wish love was like a movie.
29. I'm not a huge fan of the holidays.
30. I like the movie Star Wars
31. I want to win the lottery one day.32. I like the Starting Line.
33. I trust people way too easily.
34. I don't have a job.
35. I dont like a lot of people.
36. I like to go stargazing.37. I know a lot of people, but only have a few close friends.
38. I'm easy to get along with i think
39. I'm a very aggressive person.
40. I like having "beauty nights" with my friends.
41. I need to find something I'm talented in and stick to it.
42. I'm very insecure, even though I don't show it.
43. I really enjoy thoughtful gifts, even if they cost nothing.
44. I never want to live in Australia.
45. I'm too aggressive.
46. I love flavored lipgloss
47. Sometimes words can actually hurt me more than sticks and stones.
48. The movie Honey makes me sick.
49. I like holding hands more than anything.
50. I have no life.
51. Sometimes, I like spending time alone.
52. I'm not a big fan of relationships.
53. It needs to be quiet and dark for me to fall asleep.
54. I miss being kissed.
55. I love to find money in my coat pockets.
56. In the winter i never want to leave my house.
57. I wish I was good with directions.
58. I'm pretty good with forgetting about things.
59. I like to read childrens stories.
60. I dye/cut my hair way too much.
61. Emotional neediness scares the crap out of me.
62. Hearing people say they miss me, when I thought they didn't care, makes me smile.
63. I like the beach.
64. One of my favorite movies is Life as a House.
65. I'm very loud.
66. I feel like something's missing, even though I'm pretty content with my life right now.67. My hair has a mind of it's own, and that mind is a paranoid schizophrenic.
68. I think meat is gross!
69. For the most part I don't care what anyone thinks of me.70. I don't like having a boyfriend.
71. the song iris by the goo goo dolls is one of my favorite songs.
72. I've never (really truly) been in love.
73. I get really excited about girls/boys who play acoustic guitar.
74. I have never seen E.T.
75. I am drawn to intellect and humor.
76. I want my hair to be long but I can never grow it out.
77. I hate when people do things just to look important.
78. I love the game twister.
79. I'm not old-fashioned.
80. I watch a lot of TV
81. I'm not picky about anything.
82. I like acting like a kid.
83. I don't understand why everyone feels the need to be obsessed with star shaped things.84. Music plays a big part in my life.
85. I hate the word "emo"
86. I want silky smooth skin.
87. I love Oprah.
88. Sometimes I think to myself: Wow. People are really stupid.
89. Stupid people annoy me.90. I may sound sarcastic but I really am serious.
91. I can forgive and forget.
92. I like being mean to people I don't know.
93. I can't stand ignorance.94. Really tall people scare me.
95. I hate snow.
96. I love to laugh.
97. I don't listen to people that much.
98. I HATE hello kitty gear.
99. I think people throw the word love around too much.
100. I am outgoing
101. I hate when people always have to sound smart like when they correct the teacher.

I just realized the hilarity of the chocobo thing.   Of course if you have no idea what a chocobo is, then the description of a mini Big Bird doesn't really help.  Go here.  Hope this helps!

I don't know if this will work but I can always try pimping the chocobos..what a novel idea...pimpin' my 'cobos.
Oh, yeah, still lost in Gazaet Mountain. Maybe I'll go look that up and find the path out......

WORK SUCKS!!!
Oh, yea, I saw a bumper sticker the other day that read, Quit your real job; make music. Or something like that.. That would be cool....if everyone just made music as a living. All music equally cool, all people equally cool. Respect the art, yo. But what if everyone came off like Ruben Studdard...I don't know. There would have to be a rule, that though everyone has to make music, you can only perform if you're hot. Damn, that rules me out. Unless I was the drummer... Wait, if you were doing techno/trance/djing/etc. it wouldn't matter if you're not hot. You could lay down the beats from behind a brick wall or something. This reminds me of an article I read about a Richard James performance. He had all of this equipment set up on stage--keyboards/synths/sequencers/drum machines/processors eveytthing--yet he hid behind a huge monitor left of center stage with his notebook and laid down some wicked acid-beats. So I guess anything is possible if you're fugly or shy. Or Ruben.

Whyd id my y0-Yo fall out of my pocket? Where did that penny go?

Why am I talkiing to mysef?
Must be radiohead on repeat disk again                                                                                             

 

.--.

I just noticed that I have 3 comments on all 2 of my recent posts. Pup, you suck!

BTW..How do you make use of the Chocobos? Catch 'em, train 'em, ride 'em....? I think I caught one a while back but he ran away from me....

Cause I'm a Muther F*#king  P. I. M. P.

I don't know what you heard about me... but you can't shake a dollar outta me...

If y'all sucka ain't got your street creds, here's your first step.

Get your Pimp name
http://playerappreciate.com/pimphandle.asp

Bishop Don Pup Shizzle

Oh I hope this works. Inspired by Tricia, I'm going to try my paws at putting some pictures up on our blog. Techno-Pup assemble!

This is a picture that I took as the sun was going down in the Arizona desert. The picture itself isn't that great, but the color from the sun was just incredible..

During the day, the landscape of this area is brown and burnt, even the rocks seem to have difficulty repelling the strong heat and sunlight that bears down everyday.  For a few moments as the sun is going down, a red rosy glow fills the sky and casts a shadow down on the land.  What was once dry and dreary, now is painted with a coat of rosy glare.  Staring into the vastness of the land, it looks like a million little red flowers suddenly spring up each day at this moment, or millions of little red creatures that comes out once a day to say hi.  The land is red and rosy only for a brief moment.  Then the Darkness consumes the land.         

 
Somewhere a coyote howls to greet the night...

Hur-ray!! Hur-ray!! Hur-ray!!!! To T's Pad!

The weekend is almost here and the time is ripe for you to be piss ass drunk before it arrives!!! Folks, we're holding nothing back this time! We have hot strippers, booze and watermelon, fried chicken and booze, strobe lighting and techno/trance music and booze, Big Booty Bertha and the Spook-Juice Sisters(oh, hell yeah), whatever, you name it! There'll be tons of fun activities for the kids like Pin-the-tail-on-the-Dick (Cheney), Beat-the-hell-out-of-a-Bush for sugar-free candy! If you're a black republican like Watts or Blackwell we've got vidoes tapes of the KKK. psst...they don't like us nor does the Bush Administration. Get a clue, buckwheat!!! So, just get your ass down to Mac-Town no later than sundown. The only thing we can promise is you will get you f*cked up!! That's the consolation prize of course.

Dr. Pup's Island

Where are all these people who wins the mega jackpots of 100+ millions?  You never hear about them ever again.  I’d like to think if I just won over a hundred million dollars, you’d hear from me.  Oh you better believe you’d hear from me.  A lot.  There’d be posters, reality shows, day time talk show tours, you name it!

One thing I’d definitely do that I’ve said when I become crazy rich is to buy an island and hire a lot of scientists to work on awesome projects.  My main interests in developing are Mechs, exo-skeleton armor (bio and mechanical), and of course, super hybrid animals ( Red, you clone that liver for me and I'm adding cat-boob/human to my list of mice sized elephants, groundhog hogs, etc. to work on).

Yes, this is like Jurassic Park, but much much more unnatural.
  
The island would be defended by my arm of super attack monkeys with harden exo-skeletons as the infantry with mechs for support and artillery.  These monkeys would screech a horrifying sound when they attacked.  With their enhanced strength and intelligence, there will be no match for them (yes, even that super awesome team from Predator led by Arnold, Carol, and Jesse the body will be no match.  Maybe the A-team, but they’re old now. So they’d be slaughter even in their make shift van). 

I’m a peaceful man, but I can already see that my island and its inhabitants will be persecuted and probably put on the Axis of evil.  So I must defend myself. 

Could I better spend this money?  For good?  To help improve other people’s lives?  Make the world a better place to live?  Of course, but not in this case.      

Anyone interested in signing up?  Spaces for humans will be limited.  Act now!!

Random
Shorts (re-posted)


First of all, I aint Pup. I aint Ko neither. I'm T. Damnit, get your learn on or something!!!

Second, now that you know who I am, you needs to start commenting on my shit! Comment on old post. I don't care.

Third, Pup you're a big choad. Now I've got a story that makes me look like a chump (coming soon...), but still how can you be a man and let an opportunity like that pass you by?

Fourth, why the hell is it soooo hot?

Fifth, whoever put that dint on my car door is gonna die!!! Learn to open your car door slowly. It took me awhile, but I got it down. Though, the dint may be an improvement alongside the 20 other dints. That's right, I'm counting!!!

Sixth, What the hell is up with gas prices? I live three miles from work, and every other week I'm paying 17 bucks for 10 gallons!!! Aint that a bitch? I know, that really isn't bad, but its the principal of the thing. Glad I don't own a SUV! Suckers!!! It doesn't help that I now provide a taxi service for a hot chick (more to come later).

Seventh, I may be the only person in America that has logged 303 hours of game play on Final Fantasy Advance: Tactics, and I still haven't seen the end of the game. Oh, I beat it once and just kept playing but who the hell would design a game with no ending? Stupid programmers. Strike that. I'm not complaining since its such a kick-ass game :)

Eighth, if you comment on my posts I'll give you a free lap dance!

Argh!!  I've tried everything and nothing works.  New Templates.. completely redoing the whole thing, erasing links, I've even erased a few people (sorry about that Ko and Dan).  Nothing.  Stupid sidebar!

This is going to drive me nuts.  If I can't fix it this weekend, I'm going to have to start over... ergg....

I've tried to hold out on political things as long as I could on this blog, but it's going to get started big time the closer we get to November.  Just a warning. 

Here's a teaser. 

Things you have to believe to be a Republican today:
 
Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
 
Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
 
Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.
 
The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.
 
A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
 
The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.
 
If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.
 
A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
 
Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care
to all Americans is socialism.
 
HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.
 
Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.
 
A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense.
 
A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
 
Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.
 
The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.
 
Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
 
You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.
 
What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant. 

What is wrong with the sidebar?!  Someone please help!

Oh.. so busy...  stupid work...

Why is my tongue so yellow?  Yuk...  It's been like this for a couple of months now...  I may have to see someone about this.  It's getting a bit concerning.  It doesn't hurt or anything, it's just strange seeing my yellow tongue all the time. 

Work is sucking the blogging out of me....  Damn you corporate america!!  Damn you!!

A Very Long Post

Ok, this is a long post and it contains SC (strong cheesy) elements. This is also a post that you may be thinking right after you finish reading, wow, that’s 15 minutes I’m never going to get back.  Just a warning.  Note:  Seeing Spiderman II before this post will help you really appreciate the quality of the cheesy drunkenness of the situation!
 
I went out with my friend during my visit in Arizona this weekend.  We first met up with his girlfriend and her sister.  We were at this very nice trendy yuppie bar.  Where the people were pretty and a good acid jazz DJ played from his perch from above the restaurant/bar.  We order fancy drinks and ordered some fancy fries.  I know, only a place like this would there be fancy fries.  What does fancy fries entail you ask?  Basically, they’re fries like you would get anywhere else, these were just more expensive and had 3 dipping sauces that went with it.  The fancy ketchup, fancy ranch, and fancy strange cream sauce.  They were good.  The best part was the waiter who had the coolest hair.  It was dark on the side with a blonde/red middle.  It’s hard to explain, but it was so cool.  I was so jealous.  Anyway.   
 
As is usually the case where there are multiple people sitting at a table, the four of us broke out into our own conversations (the place was loud and difficult to speak across the table).  So I’m just jabbering with the sister.  She was quite interesting.  She mentioned that she had just donated 12 inches of her hair to this foundation that makes wigs for children with cancer.  Wow..what a great thing to do.  I bought her next drink.  It just seems right.
 
We got on talking about bars and what type we liked.  We both agreed that where we were was too trendy and filled with too many wankers trying to act important.  The two of us then started talking about dive bars and how much fun they are.  So after a short while, we suggested that we move to a dive bar.  The other two were not too thrilled over this, so we compromised and the sister suggested a half-ass dive bar.  I think this just means no one is passed out on the floor, but still dark, a bit dirty with the mix smell of old alcohol still lingering.  All that and they serve PBR in a can.  Sweetness.     
 
The sister left first for some reason I can’t recall, but we met up again at the bar.  Turns out that some of her friends were there celebrating a 21st.  This is one of those strange gatherings where everyone is a friend of a friend.  So no one actually knew each other that well.  This was great for me to get to talk with everyone.    
 
Now there were a bunch of people, I’d say around 20.  This bar was set up with plenty of chairs and couches and on the big screen tv, they were showing reruns of 80s wrestling matches.  Good times.
 
Now that we’re at a real bar, let the real drinking begin.  Being a dive bar, the drinks were big and very strong.  Good times were being had by all.  Everyone was very friendly, and the conversations were good and interesting (this is not just because of the alcohol either).  After a while of mingling, I realized I’ve lost my friend and his girlfriend.  I saw the sister, but she was just making the rounds talking to all the groups of friends.  I walked around to the nice sofa and I sat my drink down next to a girl I met earlier that night. 
 
Between seeing her earlier and the time I had been speaking with her, I think she had about 3 shots and a few beers.  She was pretty petite for someone taking in all this alcohol.  So we talked (not sure of the time, but it was long.  At least 4 wrestling matches had been decided by some miracle comeback by the good guys or some foul play by the bad guys on the big screen) and the conversation was going really well, and the drinks kept coming.  After some time, she grabbed my hand and started stroking my arm.  You’ve got really soft skin she kept saying.  I don’t know if I should just take the compliment or defend my tough rough working fingers (rough typing fingers)”. 
 
I figured I’d just go with it.  So the touching went on, we sat closer on the couch and the conversation digressed to more basic things such as how far do you live from here.  She lived very close.  Happy Happy!! 
 
So the talking and the touching and the rubbing went on for quite a while, and for some reason, I mentioned that she looked a lot like Kristen Dunst  She actually did.  No kidding.  Maybe less than I thought because of the alcohol and soft dark lighting may have blurred my vision a bit, but I really do think she did have a strong resemblance.  Anyway, she thought that was a nice complement.  She asked if I had seen Spiderman II.  Luckily for me, I had just seen it earlier that day.  She said “remember that scene at the café?  That was my favorite scene”.  As I tried to quickly recall the scene (pic from above).  She pulls me closer and this conversation happens:               
 
Her:  “Do you love me?”
Me:   “Umm.. No.”
Her:  “Kiss me.  I need to know something”
 
What happened next strayed from the movie and I leaned in to kiss her.  This is much more preferable than having a car thrown at us as in the movie.  In case you didn’t see the movie, she wasn’t being psycho, but just acting out the café scene from the movie.     
 
Her tequila laced lips were delicious.  The kiss was soft and sweet.  She grabs my hands and stood up.  Right about the same time she reached the full standing position, she fell right back down on the sofa.  She was quite drunk now.  “Come on, let’s go.”  She could hardly slur those words out.  I looked at her as she pulled out some keys and throw them on my lap. 
 
So here I had a choice, and I chose.  Did I choose wisely?  I don’t know.
 
I grabbed her keys and pulled her near me on the sofa.  I said “let’s hang out here a little longer”.  We sat and talked a bit longer.  I fought through the drunken crowd to get some water for her.  After 2 drinks later (on my shirt), I got back to the sofa.  By then, she had her head in her arms.  Being the experienced drunk that I am, I knew she was done.  I sat next to her and made her drink some water.  She laid her head on my chest.  I put my arms around her and she got closer.  Now, her hair was just below my nose.  Even through all the stink of the alcohol, her hair smelled amazing.  She cuddled closer to me on the sofa and I just sat there stroking her hair and back. 
 
I kept thinking what I could be doing instead.  What if I had taken her up on her offer?  We’d no doubt be at her place by now… did I mention she looks a lot like Kirsten Dunst?  oh man…  I daydreamed for a bit, but then I looked down at this mess of hair, still with her head on my chest, the smell of her hair all around me.  All I could do was stroke her hair and her back.  I was taking care of a girl that I hardly knew.  I couldn’t tell if I was feeling like the stupidest guy in the world or the best.  Maybe both?  Nothing like a nice stupid guy.  Argh, stupid voices not making up their minds!       
 
Eventually, her friends came by to check on her.  She raised her head for a brief moment when they came by.  All she could say in her drunken sleepy voice was.  This is Pup (no, I didn’t tell her my name is pup), He’s a really nice guy.  He’s a really really nice guy.  She head fell back into my chest.    

Oh great.  A nice guy.  Just what I was looking for.     

Back from Arizona 
 
It's about 1:30am and I finally pull into my driveway.  It's been a long weekend  (time changes are a bitch) and getting back to work tomorrow's going to pretty ugly.  Especially having to be up and presentable in about 6 hours.  Unless I keep blogging (oh I how miss blogging after only a weekend.  I have a problem I know.  I'll seek blogger therapy soon).  It's down to 5.5 hours now.. argh.. better hurry. 
 
So I'm sitting there in my car pushing the garage door opener and nothing.  My next door neighbor, whom I haven't met yet, comes out to greet me.  They were drinking in the garage as always (at 1am on sunday?  My kinda guys).  Anyway, he told me my garage had been open the last couple of days and he decided to close it for me.  There's something wrong with the sensors so he had to do it manually.  Hence the opener not working. 
 
We talked for a bit, but I'm tired (went to sleep at 5 am last night, 7am in my time zone), so I just shut the garage manually, and up I go. 
 
Now I have an uncooporative garage, my car tags are over a month expired, and all this work...  Urg... this next week's not going to be pretty.  Good news though, I don't have any more trips for the rest of the month, so I'll be able to catch up on everything this weekend.  Yay!  Home for the weekend.  What a novel idea. 
 
Hmmm... I had a point in all this.  I can't remember now... oh well..  need sleep.  I will post the near hook-up story tomorrow.
 
Night...  

Greetings From Asia


Just wanted to give my peeps in the 404 a quick shoutout. It's been over 19 years since I have been back to Taiwan. It's insane the number of people driving SUVs on this little island. It doesn't help that SUVs share the roads here with pedestrians, bicyclers, people on motor scooters, and motorcyclists. Plus, Taiwanese SUV drivers seem to share the same disregard and disdain for others as the ones in the US.

I honestly do not recognize the skyline of the city that I grew up in. It's amazing to see that the 6-story apartment building that you used to live in has been now replaced by a 20-story office building filled with crazy billboards and neon signs.

Can I tell everyone how great the food is? I have been eating non-stop since I have landed. It's nice how fresh and cheap the fruit and vegetables are here.

I also spent some time with my terminally ill grandfather in a hospital emergency room. It is really sad to see him in so much pain from the radiation therapy. We are goinig back to see him again this morning.

It's good to be back.

Pup:  Yo, T, we've had over 1000 visitors to our blog!
 
T:  That's like 10 to the 3, and some change!!
 
P: Yeah, man.  I didn't ask you to count it out, fool!
 
T:  So what do we win?
 
P:  I don't think we win anything.  I think its like we're listed as another one of those annoying bloggers that people just can't resist.  Only we're the coolest.  Our popularity will sky-rocket and we'll be Super Sprode.  I'll post something with one word and get 400 comments within the first hour.  We'll be international superstars!!!  An overnight success story.  CNN will do a feature of our articles.  Everyone will marvel at our sudden rise to fame!!  They'll be billboards in every hood showing T and Pup (like the letter T and a puppy dog).  We'll sell t-shirts, books, cd's, etc.   But soon the media will figure out what we do behind the scenes.  The feds will bust into your pad and find that you're jacking into the Matrix to steal Magic: The Gathering Cards.  T, I'm afraid you'll do lots of time.  But I'll flee the country and head out to Mars and start it all over.
 
T:  Dude, I was just wanting a naked chick to jump out of a cake.  I love cake!!!
 
 
 
 
Thanks everybody for viewing our pages!!!  Keep visiting and tell your friends about us!!!
T
 

The 1000th visitor gets a free copy of T gone wild - director's cut!!

Thoughts from the big flying tin in the sky: Part II

When I fly, I usually like to get the window seats. I like looking out and wonder how this big piece of tin ever gets off the ground. It still fascinates me even with all the flying I do. I also take the window seats because I’m always looking for little gremlins that might be tearing up the engine and wings during the flight. They’re there, and it’s people like me that keeps them honest. Of course I wouldn’t know what to do if I do see one out there, or why they would be afraid to tear out the engine and wings if I’m staring at the wings. Let’s not be logical and think too much here people. We’ll have none of that on my blogs.

Anyway, during night time flights, it’s wonderful to stare into the window to see all the little plots of lights among all the vast darkness that surrounds it. For brief moments I imagine these lights as the last pockets of humanity struggling to fight off the creatures that were brought when the sun went out, and the darkness came. That’s just silly though. Everyone knows robots will be the end of us. That or dubya. I regress.

So I stare down on the land and I wonder who these people are and what their lives are like. What are the stories they have to tell? Would I care to hear them? Would I like them? Would they like me? Could someone down there be a new friend, a new source of dislike, a new love? The answers to these questions aren’t so much relevant. What I think bothers me is that I will never know. Never will I spend enough time to find out these people’s stories. Be it they be interesting or mundane, strange or common, doesn’t matter, I won’t ever know.

That’s why I think airports are so interesting. For those brief moments, or hours, or many many painfully boring delayed hours, people from all these areas of the world come together in one place. They all come from areas that I may never be, and all going to areas that I may also never go. But for that time they are in the airport, we are all in the same place, at the same time. Each time at each airport is unique. Enjoy it.

Okay, for the record, I never did like the Golden Girls. But Knight Rider was the shizzzat!!! What was the name of the female agent in the show? KIT got more play from her than Michael Knight ever did. What a loser. But dat car was smoooth, yo! I remember riding around da hood on my BMX singing the theme song. And who can forget the A-Team!? Now I've got this theme song stuck in my head. B.A. Barrockus (or however you spell it) was one bad ass, hence the name. And his fresh gold chains!!!!! Damn!!! When I was 10 I wanted to be B.A. I even had the toys, though they were cheap G.I. Joe rip-offs. Okay, bonus points if you remember what B.A's weakness/fear was in the show....

Otherwise this post is pointless.

Give me back my BLOG!

Pup's Blog was missing in action. One minute it was there, next minute the template was all erased. No clue what happened. This is what I think though.

The blog Gods have judged and they gave our site a thumbs down. Mainly for idiotic content and wasting people's time. Thou shou not blog! An angry voice rang down. And it went away.. but like other angels who has fallen from graces. Pup rose up and said "Oh hell na bitch. I ain't going out like that. It's on." Pup work day and night (20 mins) and the blog was back.

We've rebuilt and here we are again.. Better to blog in hell than not blog in heaven...

Ok, it's really starting to not make sense now..

Anyway, Welcome back!



It's scary how concerned I was at the fact the blog wasn't coming up. I was genuinely worried. I may need to get another hobby or stop be so obsessed with this. My baby's back though. Yay!

Top 5 Sayings I Love Hearing (in no particular order)

Another Round/Pitcher?
Good Mornin' sweety!
We're going to Vegas!
Welcome home honey.
Yea, we got boiled peanuts and sweet tea here.

Bonus:
You want the chicken and eggs, scrabbled, hash browns scattered topped and diced right?

Can't figure out what to write for tomorrow's post. Should I work on the Southside Crusaders comic strip, or should I return to sad? Should I bring Snoop's Doggy Style to work, or Sarah's Fumbling...? Decisions.....

Sunday Night Programs
(guilty pleasures)

I pay very little attention to tv. Every once in awhile something will grab my attention and I'll watch a few segments. Unless its Jerry Springer...I'm channel surfing! Channel surfing is a lame sport at my apartment since I only have 4 channels...opps, forgot about PBS (now I'll burn in hell), 5 channels. During the week I'll pretend to watch whatever reality program, and whatever Fox sit-com. I'll never admit that I watch the Bachelor. Because I don't, unless That 70's Show is a repeat. Saturday is sports day if I'm around. But Sunday!!!! Sunday has the best programming, yo!

Everyone knows about the news digests that come on early Sunday morning. Early, like 11:30am, but that's when I'm crawling out of bed. Then there's NASCAR (boo) and golf (:|). And later, the FOX line-up. But from 10pm to 4am I'm glued to the couch.

It usually starts off with a Seinfield episode on FOX, followed by Friends. Then I turn to CBS for classic Cheers then I flip between the X-Files and the Practice. I don't know for sure when At the Movies comes on, but this is where I get my movie reviews. I watch ABC programming for my sci-fi fix; Stargate SG-1, the Outer Limits, Twilight Zone, etc. My favorite show lately is Providence. I was watching an episode last night, while sipping a glass of Merlot, when Pup called.

I usually go to bed after Blind Date: Weekend Edition, though I may watch thirty minutes of the news today on ABC. Monday mornings I always have a boob-tube glare in my eyes. This is cured with a cup of coffee and a newspaper. But that's it. That's all the tv I really care about. I never watch that much during the week, and I always look forward to next Sunday. When I was a kid, my parents had cable which provides an eclectic variety of programs. But my favorite then was 120 min. That was the good-ol' days when MTV played videos! Anyway, late night tv on Sundays rule my world. That's all I got. Back to work :)

From Red's site
Pretty good I must say.

A poem generated by the random poem generator, from the contents of my blog:
(http://cmdrtaco.net/poemgen.cgi?url=machete.pitas.com)

Pup regroup Man,
he prescribed meds where I like people
rant about how a Post for
Zelda
Zelda Zelda Or that my friends except
the script and I claim
the source of the voices that
several of one, should be friendlier.
The words and cameltoes..
my day I like
I headed for six months Six months. to go with
any guy getting hit in Thinking to perform. It takes is
so I do have to make sure there is no one of
this woman even have also need
Blogging is closed.

Thoughts from the big flying tin in the sky

Flying gives me too much time alone with myself. It’s not that I have a problem being alone with myself, or even mind it. I actually quite like time with myself. This however, is good only in small doses though. It’s just that sometimes too much free time inside my head is a bad thing. With too much free time, my mind quickly gets bored and wanders. It’s like a computer idling and the screen saver comes on. My mind strongly dislikes being bored, so it will always seek to entertain itself. With a lack of outside stimuli, the mind will create its own entertainment. This gives birth to the voices and a stage for them to perform.

It’s quite interesting all the unique voices that are created inside my head. Some are funny, some are insightful, there’re many that rants, there are the overly nice voices, of course there are those violent ones, and there’s always a couple of dirty ones (sometimes funny, sometimes just plain wrong). Then there are many that are insignificant, some not even speaking a language that I understand (this is quite interesting in of itself, but I won’t get too nerdy here to give my possible theories on that). Basically, those that doesn’t keep the mind interested disappears as quickly as they surfaced. Most often, a group of them would converse over some topic. Four or five separate thoughts and streams of thinking discussing topics inside my mind. It’s very interesting because I hear it as someone outside the conversation.

It is also this time that they come out. The voices that were and are always there. I generally don’t have recollection of the other voices or when they first appeared. These voices that have always been there, these were the first that I remember. These are the voices of doubts, fears, hopelessness, and apathy, all of the children of Despair. These are not to be confused with Death. This is not the voices of Death, she’s amazingly pleasant and soothing. No, these are the voices that are far worst, these are the voices of Despair. These voices were there to fill my mind as my body laid on the side of the field after the accident. Broken, and blood flowing freely out of my mouth, these were the voices that I heard. As I laid there staring into the light, warm and welcoming, the voices were excited and singing for me to give in. Luckily or unluckily for me, there was another voice that roared through those childish cries of Despair and made me struggle to take each excruciating painful breaths through my collapsed lungs.

These are the voices that whisper in my head each night. The voices that I hear in the dark, when my mind is free to wander. Suddenly, the jolt from the turbulence reminds me I’m on the plane. I can’t wait to get home.

I hate pretzels. I wish they would go back to peanuts. If there was an airline that served boiled peanuts. They could name their price.

A Question of Need

Blogging is great. I can be creative by wasting time at work. I really need to get a home computer. But who are you people? Sex fiends, manic-depressors, political activist, party animals, liars, shallow, far away, lonely, abysmal...people. You're people. That bothers me.

For as long as I remember I have harbored a great dislike for people. Shade forms and dark illusions would haunt me in my youth: I won't love you, I won't trust you, I need nothing of you.... The shadows whispered softly, and I accepted their words and allowed these thoughts to guide my actions and attitudes when dealing with people. But these echoes spoke more of fear than truth. I wouldn't learn that until much later.

And sometimes I'm not too sure I've completed the lesson. I have trouble accepting people into my life. Socializing is not easy for me. I stand aloof at parties, and I become bashful when in the presence of strangers. EVERYONE IS A STRANGER!!! I once thought this attitude was "cool," because at least I'm acknowledged as the quiet one in the corner with private thoughts and private fantasies, and private desires to kill and be killed. But this coolness would not do. I want to be introduced as Mr Show Off, for once. I don't think the same as you, here's what I believe. But if I never say anything you'll never know my agony. This was college.

My friends have forced themselves unto me; I never seek out friends, except in extremely rare cases. I guess those people who try the hardest to befriend me are worth the while. Its selfish I know, yet I believe no one should have to put up with my stubbornness. So I yield. I try not to be so hard, and I'm trying to be friendlier. The people closest to me have known me for many years; these are few in number. I still shy away a little even among friends, and I mumble when it feels good to hide, and I try too hard just to say the right words, to make myself understood. But that me, and eventually this won't be such a difficulty. I'm still uneasy in public, and I don't trust YOU!! (hehe)

So why am I here, on this blog page posting something about me when I really don't care who responds? When I should be doing work? Answering the phone (hold on--). This is people interaction, right? So what gives? I'm like you. I need to feel like I belong. I need to be accepted or rejected. I'm here for you and you're here for me. No one can do without people. And anyway this is fun. I am heard. Though I think it odd, that you're only as real as the words you post...for me, its easier this way :)

Don’t believe Porn!!

The last time I was at the doctor’s office, I decided to go for a full check up. I haven’t been in there for years, probably at least 3 or 4 years, and after some nagging from a friend, I finally caved. I randomly picked a doctor that was close to where I worked and made an appointment. I asked around the office, but apparently no one knows any doctors, but I now know the 3 best pediatricians in the state (stupid suburbia).

The day finally comes and I leave the office a bit early and I headed for the doctor’s office. I go through the usual procedure of waiting around in the waiting area, catching up on magazines from months ago (still news to me if I don’t know). Finally, I get called in by one of the nurses and follow her to the room where the doctor would see me. Oh, but it’s not that easy, I had to be weighted, measured, blood pressured, the works. When the nurse left, she said the doctor would be running a bit late from the hospital, but she’ll be right in. So I waited and waited. Apparently, we had different definitions of “she’ll be right in”. Mine being “she’ll be right in”, hers being “whenever she gets here”.

Now being the absent minded person, I didn’t really make the connection the first name of my doctor until she walked in. Thinking back, Heidi… hmm.. I still think that could’ve gone either way. So she walks in, a bit out of breath, and introduces herself. She was a young gorgeous lady. She had dirty blond hair tied up in a bun with a fair complexion and narrow dark glasses. Her doctor’s coat was only buttoned half way up with a nice soft blouse underneath. There’s some small talk, then she goes into the medical history stuff. This is the point where my mind begins to drift into every hospital porn scene ever (that my friends have told me about of course).

For the next few minutes it went perfectly as scripted. She asked me to get on the examination chair and remove my shirt so she could check my breathing. She puts her hands on my back as she gets closer to listen. I don’t know how a lot of women do this, but man, your hair smells good. I tried using the same stuff, but it’s just not the same. Anyway, she tells me to stand in front of the examination chair so she could check out more breathing. Now she’s standing extremely close. All is well. But therein lies the problem, things are a bit too well.

As I begin fantasizing what was to happen next in these scenes, she says those magic words. Could you please drop your pants and underwear so I can check for any prostate problems? Of course, all I heard was “please drop your pants”. Standing there slightly aroused, I was getting a bit embarrassed. I’m still keeping hope that this situation would follow the script and some nice hot action would ensue. What came next was not me, but another twist. The doctor called in a nurse. She explains that during this type of examination, she needed someone to observe to make sure there’s no funny business. Of course the only thing going through my head now was “GREAT!! 3 way!!”. I stand there now aroused at the fantasy of this hot doctor and her equally attractive nurse giving me a complete physical. Oh it’s going to be a good day for pup.

In a flash, I feel a tug, a pull, and a quick cupping. Then I hear those dreaded words “you can put your pants on now.” What the HELL?!!? Is that it? Did I miss something? This wasn’t supposed to happen like this. That’s it? I got a physical? Was there a key word I should’ve said or something? This is NOT what I paid for!! Well, it was, but not in my head.

Listen kids, too much porn will corrupt you. Let me warn you in case you don’t know. Porn Lies!!

Stupid Porn.

I ordered pizza the other day too. Nothing from the pizza girl either except the pizza. :(

More of a Notice than a Post

Sorry for not having been around the last few days. The bad, maybe good news, is that I won't have too much time to post anything till at least next week with my work traveling and everything. I've got some nice blogging material though. Just you wait..

Red - You, me, bubble wrap. Let's get it on! :)

Tricia - I brought great weather when I was home, then I took it to Charleston with me. 3 days of rain my ass. There was nothing but hot sun burning my face and back all weekend.. ouch..

I had about a gallon of sweet tea everyday this weekend. :)

Preview of posts I'm going to make..
- Too much time on flights makes me think too much
- Boobs, Nads, and cameltoes.. my day at the beach
- I'm a dumbass, but the fates finally smiles my way

Any votes on which to post first?

This may be the MOST pointless post EVER. Anywhere.

So I wrote this five years ago, and had it published in the school's literature magazine. At the time of publication it was incomplete and it has remained incomplete until a month ago. I don't know how I feel about this new version; the direction its heading doesn't feel right for some reason...I'll have to work on it some.... Anyway, enjoy! Oh, the second stanza is the new part.


This bread is the flesh--
I take as my own--
Crumbled to pieces
And shared among thieves;
Wholly confined as the body of one,
I am defamed and holy to none.

Wine fills the chalice--
Fermented with sin--
Sour the taste;
The life-blood of souls--
Though I drink of these spirits,
I am shamed by my heart....

These words are my soul--
A voice to be heard--
Riddled to nothing,
Dissolving away...
Empty and frantic--lifeless alone,
I am depraved--no flesh to adorn.


Actually this is the version I like! Vader can tear it to shreds now.

It seems that some really "creative" women are trying out the tried and true formula of shooting Crazy Boys Partying In PCB (Let me give a shoutout to all my peeps from PCB}. This brillantly artistic video will be imaginatively titled Boys Gone Wild....

I guess there's still some women in this world who haven't figured out it's not that hard to get boys to act all wild and crazy; all it takes is a hot female asking(a woman doesn't even have to be hot to get any results, depending on how inebriated an individual is). So the question is...if this woman talked T into dropping trou, can T count this as talking to 3 women?

I am just trying to help a brotha meet his quotas.

Disclaimer

I realize that the comic strips I write may be hard to follow. I don't claim to be a good writer, and I agree that several of the strips require edits. But I'm just having fun. Blogs provide a great medium to be or pretend to be creative. Whatever. I assume the voices of the characters, which may be the source of the confusion since my characters and the members of this blog are the same people. What I write is a fiction of sorts and whatever these people rant about is them. Hint: I'm not big on ranting. Yeah, I know, I should probably create my own characters with different names.... I don't mean to be offensive toward these people unless his name starts with a 'K' and ends with an 'O.' j/k. Anyway, I hope this clears things up. Oh yeah, here are links for Zelda (Zelda shows up at the end) and http://www.ps2fantasy.com/files/articles/29/. Which to you think is hotter? I'm kinda torn. Most days Zelda is ahead on the hot meter, but Yuna has a few more pixels in the right places....

Pup and the Police

I get nearly pulled over by the police all the time and I get pulled over pretty darn often. Usually for my incredibly bad driving. Sometimes caused by alcohol, sadly though, most often not. Also, luckily (knock on wood), I usually get pulled over when I am sober. That's because I am a much better driver when I've been drinking. I am serious. I am much better driving intoxicated (not completely, just a little bit intoxicated). I obey speed limits, traffic laws, less swearing at others, and really concentrating on the driving cause I don't want to get pulled over.

Overall, I'm just a bad driver though. I find driving to be quite a bore. I usually end up singing loudly (and quite badly) in my car (one of my favorite past times), or dancing in the car (very funny given that I live in a very boring conservative part of town. I get the most crazy looks), or staring into the nothingness and thinking about deep stuff (e.g., what I would do after I win the lottery, or the reason for human existence, or why any guy getting hit in the crotch with any projectile is ALWAYS funny). Most times, I am doing all three of the previously mentioned activities. Hence very bad driving.

Beyond the bad driving. My car is pretty crappy physically and looks like something that was just used robbing a liquor store. We'll talk physical here, cause the engine problems arridiculousdiculos. Big red (my sweet car), has a 0-60 of about.. 2 minutes.. on a good day... going down hill. So not the ideal get away car.

No hubcaps (political statement), one break light out (I think, I can't run fast enought to really see), and one head light that goes on and off (I replaced it myself, henworkmanshipmenship. I try taking it to an auto repair place, but they laughed at me and told me it was only one screw to replace it. Obviously, they don't know the degree I can fuck simple things up.)

To round out the degree of my ghetto-ness.. with all those other problems with big red, one thing she does have.. that thing is a bass system that will blow up ladies skirts within a 10 feet radius. A friend put it in cause he didn't want to just throw it away. Now I come into work scaring the nice old ladies and setting off certain car alarms.

All these years driving in the aggressive streets in the dirty south I think have also made me a bad driver too. Actually, let me rephrase my previous statement. I'm just a bad driver in this fucken driving speed challenged town that I'm in. I have cexpectationecation when I'm driving, like people not have a 10 second delay on the green light, that speed limits are simply suggestions, or that tending to your children while being on the phone in your damn big ass SVU does NOT make it ok for you to almost swive into me. At least in the more aggressive streets of big cities I know what to expect, and I'm ok with that (see Jay's post for very accurate anddescriptionription of that. A few posts back.).

All this equals Pup getting pulled over by the police on a fairly regular basis. However, when they see it's a stuff animal driving the car, DUI are not the first things on their minds.

I have no idea what the point of this post was. Listing to The Smiths a bit too much. Guess it was time for a little self hate.

I think it started out as something half ass worth reading, but it is completely gone now. oh well..

Ta ta!

P.S. - Big Red's still better than T's ride though. Now that's a ghetto-cruiser.